Resist Web Standards 

You can use <table> elements, really.
(It's NOT against the law!)

Life's simply too short not to use <table> elements. If you are strenuosly avoiding their use at all times and instead cling to insanely overdesigned clusters of floating <div>s or pixel by pixel tirelessly calculated and scarcely resizable layouts, if you are, at the same time, indulging in a series of compulsive pointless behaviours like setting redundant attributes like <style type= "text/css" > or <script language= "javascript" > in your HTML code, you could be well another victim of a recently discovered illness: the W3C Subjugation Complex.

The W3C Subjugation Complex

The only cure for it is a working brain. Do you have one? Does it shows?